Racing Roundup
The 2023 Hackfall Handicap
The 2023 Nidderdale NCV racing season got off to a great start today with the 09:03 Hackfall Handicap. The NCV stable had 7 entries - and not a single one remembered to bring their horse. However - this didn't stop them taking part in this challenging obstacle race. Some were looking fitter than others, depending on their festive food intake, but all had that look of determination which promised an exciting race.
Race goers queued up at the bookies to place their bets before the riders set off.
Slimy Sam's Odds:
Kenco Cup: 2-1
Lanky Lad : 3-1
Feisty Lass: 41/2 - 61/2
The Shoveler: 1-15
Superwoman: 7.333-9.666
Litter Lout: 50 – 1
Bossy Boots: Rank outsider
Visibility was going to be an issue....
...and the going was soft, to the point
of liquid, down in the woods
Well - it is a handicap race.
The horseless riders were under starter's orders and then they were off!!
Sneaky! They all decided to take the easy
option at the first fence,
going through the gap rather than over it.
Feisty Lass took the second fence with ease
but was then waylaid by an encroaching bramble.
Litter Lout's particular handicap was having
to carry the rubbish bag. He had to keep
stopping to collect debris throughout the course.
Lanky Lad had the advantage of height
when it came to the removal of over-head
obstacles.
and today it lived up to its reputation.
Superwoman refused the fence completely.
Then Kenco-Cup (handicapped by over-indulgence
on the mince pie front last week) decided
to find a way around the end, using a bow saw.
leaving a path clear for anyone to follow.
Lanky Lad wasted precious seconds admiring
Kenco-Cup's handiwork.
the whole team before it could be jumped, due
to having filled up with leaves, twigs, and mud.
The clearance meant that 'Weeping Rock' started
to weep as it should. A win-win situation!
Luckily leaping off the end was not
included in the 2023 list of obstacles.
The group were neck and neck as
they came out of the canal turn.
Next they had to take this minor jump.
Lanky Lad surprised race goers by stopping to
saw the end off, rather than
simply stepping over it.
This was a cunning tactic - he knew that the
other NCVs wouldn't be able to resist joining
in to move the log off the path.
This allowed him to forge ahead.
runner to carry a spade - was required
to stop and dig out a culvert.
The Health and safety conscious NCVs
decided that the dangerously slippery logs,
added to Becher's Brook on other race days,
needed removal.
in their place, the NCVs hared off up the steep path
to Alum Springs.
and needed reviving with hot drinks.
challenge of all.
'The Raging Cascades' was blocked by logs!!
the debris. Superwoman ended up lifting the
final log unaided onto dry land.
Once over the water jump it was imperitive that
the channels to the Alum Springs were
also cleared. Kenco Cup was first to
reach the obstacle and got busy with his size 11s,
scraping debris down the rock face.
An excellent outcome for future
race goers was achieved.
his spade, Bossy Boots grabbed a stout stick
and used it to clear the rotting leaves
off 'The Staircase', allowing her to reach
the top of the slope in relative safety.
Down at 'Fisher's Hall Crossing',
always a tricky one, Litter Lout and Bossy Boots
ended up having to shift a tree that had
fallen across the stream.
Once out of the water it then had to be
man-handled out of the way.
The pond pump (out of order) seemed to have
had its innards removed by person, or persons unknown.
The Shoveler tried to puzzle out how to fix it
to no avail.
The pond's island will have to remain
fountainless for the time being.
On and on ran the NCVs, overcoming
obstacles as they went.
Bossy Boots, handicapped by the need to keep
a photo record of the race, was distracted
by a hollowing ash tree at the last fence. She simply couldn't
resist stopping to record it. This lost her the race.
And then they reached the final open stretch,
in spite of their horselessness.
Three forged ahead with Feisty Lass
and Kenco Cup neck and neck.
Kenco Cup won by a whisker - in spite of
his mince pie intake.
Litter Lout limped in last, encumbered
as he was with enormous quantities of rubbish.
Once back in the owners' car park the seven riders
were given a good rub down and a helping of oats.
Days from a bygone age number 7....
Now which NCV is this we have here, sporting either a pork pie hat or an upturned dog bowl? A cheery little chap with some way to go before he can wield a pair of loppers. Take a guess as to who it could be and check next week's blog to see if you were right.
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